Something New

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On New Year's morning, I woke up to the following verse:

For I am about to do something new. See, I have already begun! Do you not see it? I will make a pathway through the wilderness. I will create rivers in the dry wasteland. -- Isaiah 43:19

What a perfect way to begin the new year. I read that verse over and over again, truly allowing it to seep into my soul. Each time I read it, something new came to the surface. As I broke it down piece by piece, here's how it encouraged me:

For I--it's not me who's doing something new. God is at work. He's cooking up something. For me, it's a daily task to take my hands off the wheel, and realize I'm not in control. Once I remember this, I'm at peace again.

Something new--not the old. Not the same old junk. Something new. Something fresh. Something that lines up with my gifts and my purpose. Something that is good.

See--keep my eyes open! When I pause and truly open my eyes, I can see Him at work. I can see the blessings He's already given me. I can see how the closed doors and open doors are directing my path.

Already begun--I don't have to wait for it to begin. It's already begun. I don't have to think, "Some day something good will begin." No, it's begun.

Make a pathway--This reminds me that He has gone before me. He is making crooked places straight. I don't have to struggle for the pathway. It's already done.

Wilderness--More about this at the end of the post.

Create rivers--create. He created it all, and He can create something from nothing. It's not my creativity that will solve my problems and make a way for me. It's His.

This verse refers to the wilderness and the dry wasteland. In the wilderness, we wander around confused, afraid, unsure of where to go and what to do. In the dry wasteland, we experience lack, thirst, and longing.

It's such a relief to be reminded that I don't have to figure it all out. I don't have to marinate endlessly on my problems, wondering how to solve them. The right ideas, opportunities, and people await me. He is doing a new thing. I do see it.

If you're in the wilderness right now, if you're in a dry wasteland, it may seem as if nothing good can come out of it. It may seem as if there is no solution to your problem, and no way out. If you're in that dark place, I encourage you to read this over and over again. Pray over it. See what is revealed to you.

Something new is happening for you. Do you see it?

Until next time...

Change Your "Why?" to "How?"

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Every once in a while, I read something that literally drops my jaw. Such was the case when I read, "Ask God How, Not Why" by Laura Story, author of "When God Doesn't Fix It."

If you're going through something--or have gone through something in your past--that does not make any sense at all, I urge you to read through the entire post. If your mind is open, the post will drop your jaw, too.

Story suggests an exercise. Take a sheet of paper and write down all your "Why" questions. I have a list of Why questions that I've marinated on in the past. You have your own Why questions. Then she suggests you flip the page and write some How questions.

I love the metaphorical act of flipping the page. It's as if we're saying, "Ok, I have lots of Why questions. Now I'm switching from the Why. I'm moving on to How."

She gives a list of suggested How questions, but you can make up your own. Her suggestions were enough to blow me away.

I highly recommend you do this. No matter what difficulty you're going through, I promise, this exercise will help you. Because my guess is this: what you're going through does NOT compute!

But here's where my jaw dropped. Story says this in closing:

God is good. He knows what, with His help, we can handle and where we most need to see His work. It's easy to sign up for a short-term mission project or donate money to a building campaign at church. And it's true; we can see God working in those places. But would you be willing to sign up for the brokenness in your life, if you knew your brokenness would bring glory to God and enable you to learn to trust Him in everything? We're tempted to measure our circumstances on the world's scale, but God's economy uses God-sized scales. His story is so much bigger than ours, and one day when we see it in totality, we'll have all the answers we desire.

Whoa! What? Check out the area I highlighted. I did sign up for a short term mission project. I do donate money to the church for building campaigns. But would I have signed up for the brokenness in my life to glorify God and learn to trust Him in everything? 

No way. I wouldn't wish this on anyone, and I never would've signed up for it. But I do see how it's working for my good. Truly. Pain has a way of changing people--for better or worse. For me and my sons, it's changing us for the better. That's because God is in it, working, changing, transforming. 

Do yourself a favor: read the post, do the exercise, and let your mind wander from Why to How. 

Until next time...

Quiet Love

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We're nearing the end of 2017--and what a year it's been. There are many parts of 2017 I'd like bury deep, deep in the soil, never to reflect on again. But there are also joyful, precious, tender moments in 2017 that I'll cherish in my heart forever. Life is crazy like that, isn't it?

The holidays can be stressful and busy. They can also be quite painful. For the woman whose husband recently walked out on her, these holidays were filled with confusion, anger, and sorrow. She's looking ahead to an uncertain future. For the husband who just found out his wife was unfaithful, he's holding his head in his hands, wondering where he went wrong. For the people who are struggling with their finances, their kids, or their health, they may be wondering, "Will this ever get better?"

When we're pondering where we are and what we're going through, our thoughts are busy, frantic, bewildered. Our minds are anything but quiet.

I loved this post, "Unchanging Reality," by James MacDonald. In it, MacDonald shares this verse:

The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing. --Zephaniah 3:17 (emphasis mine)

I strongly urge you to read the whole post. But here's a small sample:

"When you’re hurting, the worst support can be the person who rushes in with a thousand things to say, like “I know how you feel.” People say so much, yet the One who could say everything says nothing at first. No judgment. No condemnation. No questioning. No pressure for you to explain. Just there, present with you. Silent.

He will quiet Himself, and He will quiet you. He will quiet your mind that reviews, reviews, reviews. He will quiet your heart that hurts, hurts, hurts. He will quiet your mouth that might lash out in pain to hurt others.

How does He quiet you? With His love. When He breaks the silence, He will be singing over you a song. The song is about the Father’s love—His immense, unchanging, unrelenting, undeserved, all-forgiving, all-knowing, all-penetrating, all-healing love for you."

Review, review, review. Hurt, hurt, hurt. Lashing out in pain. Boy, have I done plenty of that. But now, more than ever, I'm quietly receiving love. 

No matter what someone else has told you. No matter if they left, or threatened to leave. No matter if they told you lies about your worth. And no matter how bleak your future may seem. Know this: you are loved. You don't have to earn it, all you have to do is receive it.

And let it quiet you.

Until next time...

PEAS on a Beach

My sons and I sat on the white, sandy beach of Waikiki. We'd traveled there to celebrate my 50th birthday. As we stared out at the beautiful Pacific, we talked openly and honestly about the turn our lives had taken, and how we'd untangle the future.

During the conversation, I was reminded of something I'd only recently been made aware of: my sons and I seem to have a natural tendency to encourage others. When I'm at work, or out to dinner with friends, or out shopping, it's become natural to say something nice to someone. When my sons are at school or at work, other people are drawn to their inclusive and caring dispositions. I used to view this personality trait as no big deal, but now I see it for what it is: a gift.

As wave after wave crashed against the shore, an idea was born: what if we widened our reach and helped other people? Not just our co-workers and friends, although that's wonderful. What if we created a way to help strangers? People who've lost hope and their will? What if people were experiencing trauma and chaos, and needed someone to turn to? This was something that was within our reach. It was something we were naturally equipped to do.

We'd ordered pizza on the beach, so I grabbed a Dominoes napkin and wrote:

Encouragement
Advice
Support

That crumpled napkin sat in my purse for months, kind of forgotten in all the chaos going on in our own lives. Until October, when I read something about "...one God-given idea." I'd felt it was a God-given idea right there on the beach, but I hadn't done anything with it. Now I felt compelled to do something with it.

What name could we give it? We began with E, A, and S. Not sure what to do with that, but let's marinate on it for a while. Then I attended a prayer vigil put on by my church, to support the victims and survivors of the Las Vegas shooting. That's when it hit me: add P for prayer. The most vital ingredient. I called the boys on my way home, excited. Our name would be PEAS (prayer, encouragement, advice, support).

We dove in. We created the site, and www.peashelp.com was born. We created a youtube channel. We created social media accounts. It's all still in the infancy stage, but it's out there. We're ready to help others. Our pain will not be wasted.

My hope is that you'll visit peashelp.com whenever you need prayer, encouragement, advice, or support. Simply choose a button, and you'll receive a confidential response. Also, by subscribing to our youtube channel, you'll never miss a video. And please, spread the word. You never know what other people are going through.

Until next time...

Give It a Rest

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I'd just experienced a rough couple of days, and was feeling a bit raw and vulnerable. I was reading through my devotionals, which is now my morning routine. 

Joyce Meyer's app, one of my favorites, had posted the following verse. If you're struggling with anything--if you're feeling tired, if your emotions are like a runaway train, if you're wondering "when will this stop??"--I encourage you to read this verse slowly. Savor every single word.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you'll recover your life. I'll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me--watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won't lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly. --Matthew 11:28-30 (The Message)

When I read this verse, it was like sinking into a hot bubble bath. 

Deep breath. 
Slow exhale. 
Ahh. 

"Unforced rhythms of grace" is so beautiful, isn't it?

It's moments like these when I'm reminded that it's ok that I don't have the answers. It's ok that I'm not wise enough on my own. It's ok that I make a zillion mistakes every day. It's ok. I'm learning the unforced rhythms of grace. 

Grace = unmerited favor. Grace means God fills in my gaps. He walks beside me and protects me and my sons. He comforts me through His presence, or through the presence of others. He's straightening my path.

When He says "Come to me," I must remember that He's not saying, "Come to me when you've got your act together." Or, "Come to me when you're not a jerk." Or, "Come to me when you do everything right." He wants me to come to Him, just as I am. Cracks, warts, sharp edges and all.

If you're anything like me, you try to figure everything out on your own. You try to plan for every contingency. You try to guard yourself against calamity. For decades, I paid for insurance for anything I could insure, and yet I couldn't insure against pain and heartache.

That was my way. And my way doesn't work. I'm slowly learning to do things His way.

Whatever it is you're going through, my hope and prayer is that you'll come to Him and find rest.

Until next time...

Who Encourages the Encourager?

(Photo credit: Christi Gee. Her post "Dear Encourager--3 Things We Want You to Know" is a must read! Such beautiful encouragement for encouragers)

Through this blog, I recently helped myself. Sounds strange, right? Let me explain.

I'd just experienced a very, very bad day. The day before it had been rough as well. The day before, my ex and I had exchanged cruel and heated words. I walked around in a daze, thinking, "Seriously, God? This is what I get? This is how I'm treated? You're joking, right?" The following day, some other stuff happened that left me reeling and traumatized. (Shout out to my sister who dropped everything and comforted me when I needed her the most. My family is amazing.)

Some days I'm strong and kind. Other days I'm weak and cruel. This process of changing from the inside out is not smooth. It's jagged, prickly, and painful.

Anyway, that night the boys and I were decorating our Christmas tree, knowing it would be our last time in this home. They knew what had happened that day and the day before, and we made a pact to put it behind us and have fun. We laughed, we danced, we sang Christmas carols at the top of our lungs. It's as if we were punching difficulty in the face, saying, "Take that!"

After the boxes had been put away, and after the house lights were turned off and only the lights from the tree were glowing, we eventually settled back into our nightly routines. My son sat on one couch, I sat on another. While he checked his phone, I checked my emails.

Sitting in my inbox were my own words from this blog: "After the Drought." I schedule these posts ahead of time, so I'd forgotten about it. I read through my own words, feeling encouraged and strengthened. After experiencing a rough couple of days, this post reminded me that it's temporary. It's seasonal. We won't only survive this turmoil, we'll thrive in the midst of it.

It was a fresh reminder of the roller coaster experience. Up some days, down on others. But on that night, I was thankful for this blog. I was thankful for God's gentle reminder to smile during the roller coaster ride. Yes, I may sometimes get bugs in my teeth, but isn't that better than the alternative? Riding a roller coaster with white-knuckled fear, snarling through the drops, is not a good way to live life. That is not my destiny.

Some days, we're able to encourage others. Other days, we need encouragement. On that day, I was both the encourager and the encouraged. Life is so strange and beautiful.

My hope and prayer is that this blog is helping others. I'm trusting that God is sending the right people here; the people who need it. Heck, even if you're just curious to see how a girl with a wonky situation is doing life on a crazy faith journey. Whatever your reason for reading, I thank you. 

I know one thing for sure--it's helping me.

Until next time...

After the Drought

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In the beginning of a major life trial, we do all that we can to simply survive. Got out of bed today? Check. Loved on my sons and encouraged them? Check. 

Survival equals success on those days. If you're still in survival mode, I strongly encourage you to read James MacDonald's post about Survival.

Thankfully there came a point in my life when I no longer considered it a success to simply survive. No. My definition of success has changed. I'm committed to not only surviving, but thriving. 

Tough times can be described as the wilderness, a valley, a storm. Even a drought. During the drought, we thirst for radical change in our circumstances. We long for desperately needed rain to pour down and quench our parched souls.

I listened to a message by Steven Furtick, entitled Coming Out of the Drought. It was such a great reminder that dry spells don't last forever. During a drought, Furtick points out that we will likely battle enemies like invisibility, insignificance, and intimidation. But hang in there. Rain is coming.

I'm now on a path that I never would've been on had my life gone according to my plan. But you know what? I like this road. I like this me. And even though I face a lot of unknowns, I'll be ok. My sons will be ok. Better than ok...thriving.

If you're in the middle of your desert right now--or your wilderness, or your valley, or your storm--hang in there. Cherish each small cloud that promises rain. Rejoice in every drop of moisture that lands on your tongue. 

Droughts don't last forever. Eventually, rain pours down and quenches what had seemed unquenchable.

"...there is a sound of abundance of rain." 1 Kings 18:41

Until next time...