Don't Waste Your Pain

(photo credit)

I listened to a series of podcasts by Rick Warren of Daily Hope entitled Never Waste Your Pain parts one and two. Joel Osteen also has a wonderful message, Don't Waste Your Pain.

In a nutshell, Warren teaches how God uses pain to help us fulfill our purpose. We shouldn't be ashamed of our pain--we should use it. (By the way, I'm still sometimes ashamed of what's going on in my family, even though I can't control it. Obviously more growth is needed in this area!)

This blog was formed out of my own pain, and my sincere hope is that it'll help others who are going through similar situations. Before this pain barreled into my life uninvited, my thoughts were all about me, me, me. Even now I still struggle with self-centered thoughts and wishes, but hey, we're all works in progress, right?

How is pain used to fulfill God's purpose for our lives?

1. God uses pain to draw us closer to Him. People either run to God or away from God. I'm so thankful I'm in the "run to" camp. Seriously. I have no idea how people go through such trauma without faith in their lives. I've had to learn how to surrender it all, and allow Him to work within me. 2 Corinthians 4:8 says this: "We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed." I wouldn't have learned this truth without going through pain.
2. God uses pain to draw me closer to others. Warren called this "the fellowship of suffering." In other words, "Love your neighbor as yourself." Pain can teach us how to really love. I see people so differently now. If someone is acting angrily or irrationally, I now recognize that they're going through some sort of pain themselves. Going through pain teaches us to reach out and allow ourselves to be vulnerable. It's taught me to (try to) keep my eyes off myself. 
3. I can use pain to become more like Jesus. This is all about growth in character. I've noticed it not only in myself, but in my three sons as well. Galatians 5:22-23 teaches "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control." Have I experienced tremendous growth in each of these areas? Yep. How? We learn to grow in these areas by going through difficulty. But that growth is a choice. Some people allow pain to make them bitter. But Proverbs 20:30 teaches how a painful situation can change our ways and build resilience; "Blows and wounds scrub away evil, and beatings purge the inmost being."
   
4. I can use my pain to help others. As I mentioned, this blog was born from my own pain. Sure, I kept it all bottled up inside for a while. But then I felt pressed to speak out about my pain, and how I've coped and what I've learned from it. We will all experience pain. God has patiently taught me how to take a moment to stop complaining and pay attention to the needs of others. He's taught me how to pull myself out of my pity party and refocus on the pain of others. He's taught me how to encourage others who are in pain. 2 Corinthians 1:4 reminds us of this beautiful truth: "He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us." Who better to help someone who's going through cancer than a cancer survivor? Who can better help a victim of rape than another victim of rape?
5. I can use my pain to witness to the world. When I hear the word "evangelism," I get very nervous. But Warren reminds us that the highest form of evangelizing is to witness during our pain. The world isn't impressed with how we handle prosperity. Sheesh, anyone can handle prosperity and good times well. No, it's all about how we handle adversity. Our successes don't give us credibility...what gives us credibility is how we handle difficulties. Case in point: I've always been impressed by my sons, but the way they've handled this adversity makes them even more impressive. And now they're out there helping others who are hurting. What a beautiful gift that was born out of tremendous pain.

Our deepest life message will come out of our deepest pain. As hard as the pain is to go through, it's important to remind ourselves that we're "going through." We don't have to remain stuck in the painful place. 

We will all experience pain in our lives. The question is, will we use it for good? Or will it be wasted?

Until next time...