Why Me? Why You? Why This Trial?

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Why me?

I'm gonna guess that most of us have asked this question during times of trial and discouragement. Hope seems lost. My world is falling apart. Everyone around me seems to blissfully have their act together.

Why this trial? 

I'm a decent person. Not perfect, but kind. Plenty of mistakes in my past, but plenty of goodness, too. Many times I've laid in bed staring at the ceiling, or sat at work staring at the computer screen wondering why?

Pondering and reasoning cause confusion, and I'm so guilty of stepping into that trap. But sometimes I get a small glimpse of the why. Like when I read Why Trials? by James MacDonald.

I've learned that God allows trials. Even if He didn't cause them, He can use them for our good.

I've often wondered if God caused this trial in my life. Or was it the enemy working against me? Or is it nothing spiritual, but simply my own mistakes that led to this? Or was my whole life with my husband a big, fat mistake? Were we never meant to meet in the snack line during middle school? Those two times I broke up with him but got back together--were those mistakes I should've avoided?

See how confusion and reasoning can become a trap?

Anyway, whatever the cause of my trial, and whatever the cause of your trial, trials can improve our conduct and our character. Here are some snippets from MacDonald's post about Why Trials?:

"A trial is a painful circumstance allowed by God to change my conduct and my character. My conduct—that’s what I do. And then on a deeper level, my character—that’s who I am. Trials signal that God is making adjustments in my actions and my spirit. Several biblical terms are actually interchangeable: trials, suffering, hardship, tribulation, chastising, and discipline. Trials are hard times!"

"Here’s the unalterable fact: Pain is often a central part of God’s purpose in this world. God allows and sometimes even causes pain in our lives. It’s one of the tools He uses to get stubborn sheep to greener pasture."

"Far from abandoning us when we’re going through difficult trials, God moves toward us. He’s not folding His arms; He’s rolling up His sleeves. He’s getting ready to do something in your life that you haven’t previously been willing to let Him do. In fact, trials are proof of love.

Never forget this: When God allows you to experience trials, His motivation is love. His eyes are upon you. His attention is toward you. This is biblical love—a love that’s willing to take you through a valley to get you to a hilltop. No pseudo solutions or quick fixes with God. He is going for deep, lasting change in you, so “he disciplines [you] for [your] good” (Hebrews 12:10).

God’s taking you to a better place. God sees the bull’s-eye, and He’s aiming for it. Like a skilled dentist, God is only drilling out decay, stuff that has made you restless and miserable all your life. When the work is done, your life will be better, but only if you embrace what God is doing."

I can testify to the truth that trials change our conduct and character. Mine have completely changed for the better. Same for my sons. Do I wish it would've happened without all the pain? Of course.

God is taking me and my boys to a better place. I don't know where that is yet, but I see it on the horizon. I feel it deep within my spirit.

Whatever it is you're going through, my hope and prayer is that you'll open your heart to God and what He's trying to do.

Until next time...